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Release Date

2009-04-17 06:10:57 by albatross412

Woudl any of you know when the game Brutal Legend will peak its head for a release date? I'm dying to get my hands on just a demo of that game!

I just want to know what the Newgrounders are listening to. Tell me your favorite artist and your favorite song by said artist. Please tell me why you love'em too. Can't wait to hear your responses.

Coheed & Cambria-Gravemakers and Gunslingers

Rush-Farcry or Freewill (can't decide between them)

Rush delivered a unique sound to their art and was the inspiration for Coheed & Cambria. Both kickass bands.

Long live Geddy Lee!

"Hentai", a Japanese word for "strange desires". They pertain entirely to anything arousing. Hentai is in the form of anime's usually. Hentai can range from normal pornography to the just plain horrific. Some hentai actually involves children, I repeat CHILDREN. That kinda qualifies as both pedophelia and child pornography and I gaurantee it would be disturbing. It could also involve tentacles and robots. Indeed hentai is strange desires but moreso unmedicated perversions that should have a Megan's Law sign slapped on it. This is why I don't like the thought of such flashes put on Newgrounds. I will never review anything that borders on the line of hentai.

Enjoy your tentacles wierdos! Because I sure won't!

This has to end.

2009-04-16 15:10:22 by albatross412

How do I get someone kicked off of Newgrounds. This person is posting hateful comments and messages such as religious and ethnic slander. We can't allow someone like this to be making Newgrounders enraged. We have to get him off the best effing site ever made.

My System

2009-04-16 10:51:25 by albatross412

Good morning Newgrounders and I hope you all had yourselves a good Easter. I'm back for more reviews and I want to share my system with you guys on how I review flash games and animations.

Presentation-How are you executing your flash and making it appeal to us will be a great factor in a review.

Subject of Seriousness-If a flash is to be serious then I expect seriousness throughout. If you add an animation that completely breaks away from the mood that it had set so successfully for the sake of a cheap laugh with low-brow humor then a serious jeopardizing of flash's score can occure.

Art Style-I really don't care if your an artistic god or otherwise. I just want the art style to be appropriate for the flash. If you are going for a serious story line with less than satisfactory art skill then I will not mind at all. If your doing it for the sake of humor then your score can be at stake if it is not a satirical piece.

Animation-In a flash I expect polished character movement that is appropriate for the flash. Movement can be difficult to execute (especially in games). Try your best because to me this isn't a paramount factor (to an extent).

Sound-In ANY I repeat ANY flash there should be decent sound quality or else the score will surely suffer. I've been pretty leniant with sound in the past, but no more will I tolerate poor voice-overs, sound effects, etc.

Musical Score-Only in games does this really count. I expect music to be clear and that fits the world the game is immersed in. I also want originality, something self-made. If not, give credit to its creator.

Controls-For games only. I don't want controls to be too sluggish or too sensative. This can create a mass amount of complaints from critics as well as me. I also want the controls to be intuitive and simple but still gives a wide variety of actions you can perform. This mostly pertains to action and shooting genres as well as adventure genres as well.

Plot-Usually in action and adventure games and flash movies is this a factor. I want something that makes it worth my time playing and/or watching. I want characters to be interactive and I want the plot rich with content. A huge factor in most cases.

Time Lapse- A factor in all flash movies and games. If something is just too short or too long, then there is a problem. 1:The flash ends when it starts to get good. 2: It just keeps stretching on and the plot stinks at the same time. A flash needs moderation. This is a HUGE factor all the time.

Bias-I try my damndest not be biased with a review. I look at both the pros and the cons of any flash. If a flash is anything but satisfactory I still try to name the good things about that flash. If I DO turn out to be biased then I will gladly rereview the flash in question upon the AUTHOR'S REQUEST ONLY! Sorry no pissed off fans can convince me.

Effort-I can see if an author put effort into their work or not. This is a COLOSSSAL factor.

10-Having so little flaws that are completely diregarded due to astounding work and effort upon the author's part.

9-Just about everything ten is, but flaws are more apparent but not serious in the least bit.

8-Still very good with a change here or there that could've been better, but still a great flash.

7-Just like eight except the changes wanted are more essential. Still a good flash.

6-The flash is at least decent but the flaws are pretty noticeable and should be dealt with.

5-The flaws of the flash are serious but not horribly. Still pretty decent but not very satisfactory either.

4-The flash's pros and cons are at nearly the same level with the bad outweighing the good, a little more than slightly. Flash skills are put into question.

3-This just isn't your business. A flash that just couldn't do it. A bad flash in the end.

2-The flash is just horrible and people shouldn't waste their time with. If they do.....they're not people.

1-I am death and I will endow a plague onto your dwellings, burn your family, and rape your eyes and ears!

0-No such score exists in my book. If you make a flash this bad I'll actually GIVE you a point for doing so.

NOTE: I do not review anything pornographic (except for Sonic the Pervert, which I was biased in apologies). I also do not review internet pranks such as screamers. It makes sense in the end. Am I supposed to comment on how round that chicks butt was or how long that dude's boner is or even how loud I screamed my head off seeing Linda Blaire's tortured face scream at me? Not something I enjoy, period.

My thoughts exactly

2009-04-11 23:00:56 by albatross412

I accept all religions and beliefs as well as all ethnicities and cultures. It just makes the world all that more fascinating!

Say Good-bye to Thee.

2009-04-11 01:16:32 by albatross412

I must now anounce the release of Sonic and the Black Knight which in turn anounces the end to Sonic the Hedgehog. I know you wish not to accept this but his downfall is indeed inevitable. With releases like The Black Knight, Secret Rings, Shadow the Hedgehog, and need I say more that Sonic and his unecessary gimicks are almost to their ends. Sega's funds are on the brink of nothingness and Sega themselves are beyond stupidity. I as well as you know the secret to his revival........JUST SONIC. Like.....c'mon Sega! Are you stupid AND BLIND!? Every reviewist, every fan, every gamer, everyfuckingone wants the same godamn thing....JUST SONIC, JUST SPEED, JUST THAT! No guns, no swords, no wearhogs, and no fucking Clint Eastwood lisps. We dpn't want missions, we don't want unecessary characters, and above all.......GIMICKS! There you go, the secret to Sega's revival! I mean, christ man Sonic's last good title wasn't even made by you guys! Brawl actually did Sonic justice by not using any of your lame add-ons as part of his moveset. It was Sonic being SONIC! His last decent title wad the Dark Brotherhood abd hint hint wasn't completely developed by you guys. You may have created Sonic but others are getting the credit because actually spear-headed the whole operation. Bottom-line is they know what we want, YOU DON'T!

The New Business

2009-04-03 05:59:27 by albatross412

I hope to become a flash game designer so I can contribute to the site instead of posting reviews all the damn time. I am also working on a sixteen volume series that will rock the world!

Through the system

2009-04-01 15:43:23 by albatross412

I hate hate this fucking fucking Chinese Rules joke joke. I double the words that are insulting insulting to see if I can get my point across across without it getting changed changed.

I hate April Fool's

2009-04-01 15:35:48 by albatross412

I quite don't understand why newgrounds looks like it has been taken over by a Chinese dictatorship. I honestly think this is a prank by the guys that run the site for April Fool's. I am really annoyed by the fact that all my reviews and posts are in "engrish". It is pretty annoying.